The Little Women

There is a certain beauty in a structured chaos. It was busy, very busy. Yet somehow they all moves rhythmically, like  beautiful tune amidst an incomplete sonata. The song is subtle, yet somehow being heard loud and clear for those who know how to sing along. The hustle and bustle of the place bring the brightest smile to faces that happened to be there,  Like they finally found home or somewhere to belong. Ananda Khaira Azizah, Pekanbaru, 30 Desember 2024. Hari Senin, pukul 3 pagi.

Nothing beats the way they are. Nor the way they were; neither the way they will be. Because yesterday remains a memory, while tomorrow is an open book of so many opportunity. An opportunity to be happy, to be healthy, or even to learn a new study. Because who knows? You might be on the verge of a record breaking history, or in a new journey of self discovery. All of which puts you in charge of your own destiny. So have you find out what kind of story will it be? Ananda Khaira Azizah, Pekanbaru, 27 Desember 2024. Hari Jumat, pukul 6 pagi.

About two nights ago a friend asked me : “What if in the next 5 years we’re still exactly where we are, because we already content with what we have? Is it wrong to stay the same?” And do you know what my response was? “I seriously can’t find the error in that. I think it’s okay.” So okay, on a more serious note, why would I think that way? Do I not want to advance on my career, explore other new things or even, going back to school? Well, I think that question is overrated. What is so wrong with staying the same? As long as you’re happy with it. Because I know very well that contentment is different for each and every one of us. It drives you crazy to thirst for acceptance & appreciation of others instead of you accepting yourself. And who in the world knows that you stay the same? For God sake only you knew. They can only see your achievement from the outside perspective, like your career and so on. They never know what inside battles you’ve fought, wars you’ve won, things you’ve...

There’s a creature Living in my bathroom About a finger long, with its eight  limbs strudded through a song “Who knows blank is such  a good dancer?” they say.  So many beautiful moves w/ its long legs and all. Then it walk slowly, it observe very  carefully. And it finally ask me, Oh can you guess, can you guess who blank might be? Ananda Khaira Azizah, Pekanbaru, 23 Desember 2024. Hari Senin, pukul 10 pagi.

A child never see grapes in its full form, right? They never see them in clusters, only one single grapes already been picked from the other. That’s what happen with people life’s story too. We never knew their whole story. We only knew one bits of so many others. The ones we knew were the ones they disclose for the whole world to see. And the ones they don’t? Well, only them knows. So you better be kind because we don’t know what kind of things they currently been dealt with and what experiences they’ve been going through. Just give them the benefit of the doubt and move on. Please, oh just please stop picking on people.  Trust that every decision they’ve made had been thought carefully with dozens of considerations, along with its pros and cons. If you don’t trust humans, well, at least put your trust in their humanity, and yours. Ananda Khaira Azizah, Pekanbaru, 17 Desember 2024. Hari Selasa, pukul 8 malam.

Sometimes Someone might hear you,  but never really listen. Like we’re just some passing noise in their vocal world. Sometimes someone might look at you,  but never really see. Like we’re just the abstract dots on their field of important vision. And so that discrepancy between what you want from them and what you get create room for disappointment, no matter how minor. So that someone might as well be you. You will hear and you will see. So you won’t feel unheard or invincible ever again. And always remember, only us that will love ourselves enough to go through everything that life throw at us. Love yourself enough. Ananda Khaira Azizah, Pekanbaru, 8 Desember 2024. Hari Minggu, pukul 12 malam.

Thank you for hugging me at night, baby. For the river of love that never stop flowing, for the endless cuddles that ever so soothing,  For the million hugs & kisses, and streams  of memories that  as precious as life itself. Having children literally is the best decision  that I’ve ever made in my life. Like many say “There’s nothing quite like it.” The stress (😂), the worry, the memory, but most importantly, the love that he gave me.  Those little hands, it sustains me. He sustains me.  You might see like I’m the one that guide him  but truly, he’s the one that guides me. He guides me with love & compassion;  curiosity & excitement. Baby is really,  really in love  with life. Then it makes  mama fall in love with life, too. So thank you, baby. For showing me that life isn’t just the mundane everyday things that’s going on repeat. That life is so, so much more than that. Thank you for making me feel hopeful, beautiful ...